


Want to Give Up the Ghost with Just a Little More Poise

by jensul



Category: Fall Out Boy, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Child Abuse, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-02
Updated: 2016-10-10
Packaged: 2018-08-19 03:52:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8188573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jensul/pseuds/jensul
Summary: His father tells him that his room is the first door on the left which wouldn’t actually be that hard to figure out on his own considering that they’re living in a shitty two-bedroom house. He had a fifty-fifty chance of picking the right bedroom without the help. After walking into his new room and throwing his shit on the floor he looks up just in time to see someone walk straight through his wall. It’s then that Ryan decides that moving won’t be as bad as he originally thought. It’s a thousand times worse. In which Ryan Ross can see ghosts and just so happens to move into a house with the most annoying one possible.





	1. Chapter 1

Prologue

 

Ryan was all packed up and in the car with his father on the way to their new house in the middle of some dead end town in New Jersey.

To say that he was mad would be an understatement. He had stopped being mad about three states back at that shitty gas station where the Asian who was working at the counter kept staring at him.  Now he was _pissed._ It hadn’t really sunken in that he was moving half way across the fucking country with his father (who’s sober for the first time in who knows how long) until they passed the shitty sign in obnoxious lettering that read “Welcome to New Jersey”.

It might as well have said “Welcome to Hell”.

That leads him to where he is now. Sitting in the passenger’s seat of his dad’s cheap ass car (it was all that they could afford) blaring music in his ears in an attempt to forget about this mess that he’s in.

 

It doesn’t work.

 

Just when Ryan thinks it can’t get any worse they actually pull into their new drive way.

 

The house looks like shit.

 

It’s small as fuck and look like someone abandoned it years ago. The paint is chipping, the sidewalk is cracked, and the grass is longer than the list of things that Ryan has to live for.

 

Ryan decides to just drop his things in his room and sleep. If he’s lucky he won’t wake up in the morning.

His father tells him that his room is the first door on the left which wouldn’t actually be that hard to figure out on his own considering that they’re living in a shitty two-bedroom house. He had a fifty-fifty chance of picking the right bedroom without the help.

After walking into his new room and throwing his shit on the floor he looks up just in time to see someone walk straight through his wall.

It’s then that Ryan decides that moving won’t be as bad as he originally thought.

 

It’s a thousand times worse.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I realize that this is shit. This is my first fanfiction and I'm writing it to see if I can more than anything. I'm not even sure if I'm going to continue this to be honest. If enough people like it then I probably will. Keep in mind that if I do continue writing this I'm probably not going to continue posting until I'm completely done with it, so it might take a while. Thanks for reading.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For future reference anything italicized is Ryan or a flashback.

_Ryan had been five the first time he saw a ghost._ _There was no near death experience or tragic accident that suddenly allowed him to see._

_It had just happened suddenly one day._

_He had just gotten in from playing outside when he suddenly saw a strange elderly woman standing in his kitchen, and_ _being the naïve child that he was he decided to talk to the peculiar woman._

_Naturally she was a bit startled when Ryan addressed her._

_The boy had lived there his whole life and never once had he given any indication that he was able to see her up until that point._

_She had introduced herself as Anita and they began talking._

_Ryan decided that he liked the strange woman, and she told him stories up until dinner time._

 

Ryan quickly averts his gaze from the mysterious ghost. This isn't a new occurrence to him. He's far too use to paranormal activity.

He learned long ago that it’s best to pretend that you can’t see them.

If they know that you can they start to want things from you. It’s always, “Tell my daughter” this or “Make sure that they know” that. They really don’t care about what YOU want.

If they wanted these things done, then they should have done it themselves when they were still alive. It’s not his problem.

So, instead of acknowledging the ghost Ryan does what he does best.

Ignore his problem.

This course of action proves to be rather difficult however.

As soon as Ryan sits down on the dirty floor (they didn’t have enough room in his father’s car to fit his matress, and they couldn’t afford a U-Haul) the ghost’s eyes are immediately on him.

Ryan can feel them burning through the back of his head, but tries to ignore it.

For a while he even manages to succeed. Until the ghost gets bored of staring and starts talking that is.

“Damn, he’s cute,” the ghost suddenly says.

Ryan can feel himself blush, but continues to ignore the him.

“I wonder what his name is…. He looks like a Lenard.”

‘ _Lenard? Who the fuck names their kid Lenard? '_  Ryan thinks to himself

“I TAKE IT BACK! He’s definitely not a Lenard. He looks like a Jackson”

‘ _At least Jackson sounds better than Lenard '_

Ryan, growing bored of the boys rambling, decides to write in his journal.

This of course doesn’t work out either seeing as the ghost decides to get all up in his face.

“Oooo, I’m the ghost of the Flying Dutchman” the ghost says while making ridiculous hand motions.

_‘Ignore him_ ’

“I’ve come to take you to Davy Jones locker”

‘ _Ignore him_ ’

“And once we get there we can have unbelievably mind-blowing sex” he says while still making those ridiculous hand motions.

_‘IGNORE HIM '_

“BOO” the ghost says mere inches from Ryan’s face.

On any normal day Ryan was a very patient boy, (on many occasions Spencer would compare him to a saint to which Ryan would always give a snarky reply about how the members of the Catholic church got way more gay sex then he ever would) but today was not a normal day. Today Ryan had left everything that he knew and loved behind (AKA Spencer. There really wasn't much else for him to live for at this point) in order to go to some random ass town in New Jersey with his drunkard of a father. 

To say that he was in a bad mood was an understatement. So, really it wasn't much of a surprise at all when he finally snapped.

“WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP” Ryan exclaims finally releasing his frustration out on the ghost.

They both blink. Ryan in shock of his outburst and the ghost in confusion.

“Can you-“ the ghost starts only to be cut off by Ryan’s father from outside his door.

“Ryan, are you okay?” George asks

Ryan lets out a sigh of relief that doesn’t go unnoticed by the ghost.

_‘Looks like he hasn’t started drinking yet’_ Ryan thinks to himself.

“I’m fine dad. Just dropped some stuff.”

“Well, okay then.” George says suspiciously

There’s an awkward silence between Ryan and the ghost as the sound of George’s footsteps fade.

The ghost then suddenly decides to break the silence.

“Can you see me” he whispers out with his eyes pointedly looking downward toward the floor.

_‘Shit. What do I say? Do I tell the truth? '_

Ryan hesitates for a moment.

“Yeah, I can see you.” he eventually says.

The ghost is still, and for a moment Ryan thinks that he’s going to cry or something.

“YOU BITCH” the ghost exclaims

Ryan eyes widen in shock at the exclamation.

“IF YOU COULD SEE ME THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE SAID SOMETHING INSTEAD OF LETTING ME MAKE A FOOL OUT OF MYSELF”

For a second the ghost looks mortified. “I was just kidding about the sex thing….” the ghost says while blushing.

Ryan just stands there speechless.

_‘What the fuck is going on._ ’

Ryan had gotten a lot of different reactions from ghost when they found out that he could see them. Some cried in happiness, others hugged him, there was even some occasions when the ghost just decided to ignore him, but this was unheard of. Ryan didn’t know how to react to this.

“Um, s-sorry about not telling you earlier” he finally manages to say

_‘Damn that stutter to hell. Let it burn in the deepest depths with the filthiest of sinners’_

Ryan, while admittedly having a good sense of wording in his thoughts and on paper has never been one for actually speaking. Over the years he even managed to develop a bit of a stutter. Normally it’s not a problem. He rarely talks, and when he does it’s to Spencer who doesn’t mind, and has commented on more than one occasion about how adorable it is, only to be promptly punched in the arm by Ryan moments later. Spencer’s not here now though, and Ryan’s going to have to talk to new people who might not be as understanding about it as he was.

He’ll worry about that later though.

“Don’t worry about it.” the ghost replies with a smile.

“How rude of me! I forgot to introduce myself. I’m Brendon. What’s your name?” the gho- Brendon asks.

_‘Definitely not Lenard '_

“Ryan” he replies quietly

“Well, Ryan” Brendon says while smiling “I hope that we can get along seeing as we’ll be sharing a room and all”.

 

_‘Definitely a thousand times worse.’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided that since the prologue sucked that I'd go ahead and type up the first chapter to help you guys get more of a feel for the story. Like I said last chapter I'm not really sure if I'll finish this story, so if you want me to give me a comment. Feed back is more than welcome. Part of the reason that I wrote this story was to improve my writing skills.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to update the prologue of this story. I felt that it gave too much away about Ryan's past. This way people will be able to find things out themselves when Ryan mentions it.
> 
> To anyone who already read the prologue before I updated it, congratulations. You now know more about Ryan and his past than the people who haven't. Yay!
> 
> Sorry if this is an inconvenience.

It only takes twenty minutes for Ryan to realize that Brendon is the most annoying ghost that he has ever met, and considering the amount of ghosts that Ryan has met this statement is not to be taken lightly.

 

After the awkward introductions from a few minutes ago Brendon started asking Ryan questions. 

 

He hasn’t shut up ever since.

 

“Where did you say that you were from again?” asks Brendon. This is the third time that he’s asked this question.

 

Ryan is beginning to get annoyed.

 

“Nevada” Ryan replies while laying a blanket out on the floor as a makeshift bed. Either Brendon’s too dense to decipher the annoyed edge to his tone or he just doesn’t care. Ryan is betting on the latter.

 

“Why did you move here?”

 

“My father got a j-job here” was Ryan’s quick response. If Brendon notices the stutter he doesn’t comment on it. For that Ryan is thankful.

 

“Where’s your mother?”

 

Ryan is now considerably less thankful and considerably more annoyed.

 

_**Three months ago** _

_Ryan had been hiding in his room all day. Earlier that day his mother and father had started one of their usual arguments. Ryan had learned long ago that getting involved would just make it worse, so he did what he did best and ignored the problem._

_A couple of hours later Ryan found his mother with slit wrist in the bathtub. She didn't even bother writing a_ _suicide note._

_That was the worst birthday of Ryan's life._

 

_At the funeral Ryan couldn’t help but think that she should have taken him with her._

 

“Dead.” Ryan replied in a voice void of emotion that had taken years to master.

 

For a minute Ryan thinks that Brendon is going to give his condolences for his loss. That’s what everyone else does after all.

He hates it.

Everyone just says it to improve their conscience. They don’t actually give a damn about his mother.

 

But contrary to Ryan’s original belief Brendon stays silent. There isn’t even a hint of a false apology on his lips.

 

For a second Ryan thinks that Brendon just might understand how he feels.

 

“What’s your favorite color?”

 

_‘Or maybe Brendon’s just an idiot. ‘_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know anymore. Like, originally I was going to wait to update until I had finished the story in order to insure that there were no plot holes, but now I feel bad making you guys wait. It's only been a day and I already feel guilty. So, now I'll probably just update every now and then.
> 
> Thanks to the people who commented on the last chapter. I really appreciate it.


	4. Chapter 4

Eventually (after two hours of nonstop talking) Ryan finally gets Brendon to leave him alone so that he can try to sleep. Try being the key word seeing as how Ryan soon finds that he can’t sleep. Instead he decides to lay awake and think.

This is never a good idea. Especially for Ryan.

When Ryan thinks he really _thinks._

Perhaps it’s from years of being deprived of a tv to rot his brain, (they couldn’t afford cable when he was a child) but Ryan has a _very_ active imagination, and all of the emotional trauma that he’s acquired through the years just help to fuel that imagination.

 

He begins to think of Spencer. Of all that they had been through in the years that they’d been together. How much he misses him already.

 

How he’s probably never going to see him again.

_‘He’ll probably be better off without me.’_

 

Just as his thoughts start to take a darker turn he gets interrupted.

“Psst Ryan, are you awake?”

_‘No’_

_“_ Yes Brendon.” Ryan replies in a whisper so as to not risk waking his father up.

“Can I sleep with you?”

_‘Hell no.’_

“Ghost d-don't even need sleep” replied Ryan

“I know, but I’m booooored, and I wanna watch you sleep.”

Ryan hesitates for a moment. “If I say y-yes will you be quiet?”

Brendon appears in front of Ryan’s face and nods his head vigorously.

Ryan takes that as a yes and scoots over on his makeshift bed to allow Brendon under the covers.

Ryan knows that Brendon doesn’t technically need the blankets, but giving him some still feels like the right thing to do.

 

 

With the help of the dim moonlight streaming in from Ryan’s bedroom window he takes his first _real_ look at Brendon.

 

He notices the fact that Brendon’s hair is a little darker than his, yet despite being dead it’s shinier.

 

He notices Brendon’s overly plump lips, and can’t help but wonder what secrets hide behind them.

 

Maybe in time Ryan can unravel them?

 

Most of all he notices Brendon’s eyes.

 

His eyes are a similar brown to Ryan’s own yet _so_ different.

Ryan’s eyes are dull and lifeless. The eyes of someone who has seen too much in their short life. But Brendon’s are _full_ of life.

 

It’s ironic really. Even the dead manage to feel as though there’s something worth living for.

 

Most just realized too late.

 

Ryan can’t help but think that the oxymoron that is Brendon’s eyes being filled with life is rather poetic.

Perhaps it could be compared to kissing your lover goodbye for one final time or being surrounded by love ones as you take your final breath. It’s a tragic beauty.

 

_‘Maybe Brendon won’t be so bad after all.'_

With that thought in mind Ryan manages to have the first nightmare free sleep that he’s had in months.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I realize that this story is formatted SUPER weird. Sorry about that.
> 
> I think that I know how this story is going to play out. I have an ending in mind, but everything in the middle is kind if up for debate. I'll just wing it and see how it plays out.
> 
> Tell me what you guys think. Reviews are always welcome. I want to know your opinions whether they're good or bad. :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mood: Pete Wentz screaming in the distance

 

  **Beep Beep Beep**

“Ryan.”

_‘Five more minutes mom’_

“Ryan, your alarm is going off.”

_‘That doesn’t sound like mom….’_

“RYAN WAKE THE FUCK UP”

_‘That **defiantly** doesn’t sound like mom.’_

“You’ve forced me to do this Ryan.”

 

Ryan suddenly felt a heavy weight on his abdomen.

“OUCH” Ryan can’t help but exclaim

When he finally opens his eyes his vision is filled with nothing but Brendon’s face.

 

On any normal occasion Ryan would consider waking up to a cute guys face a good thing, but when said cute guy is crushing you and making it difficult to breathe it’s a different story entirely.

_‘Who knew a ghost could weigh so much?’_

“Sorry about randomly crushing you like that, but your alarm has been going off for like five minutes, and it was starting to annoy me.” Brendon says while moving off of Ryan.

“Sorry about that B-Brendon”

 

_‘Fucking stutter.’_

Ryan looks over to alarm.

_5:15 am_

 

“Why are you getting up so early anyway? Do you start school today?” asked Brendon

_‘I don’t want to be here when my alcoholic father wakes up’_

“No, I start school tomorrow. I just w-want to explore the town, and get fa-familiar with everything.”

“Oh, I want to go! I can show you around! Can I please go with you?!” Brendon said while giving Ryan his best puppy dog eyes

Ryan just couldn’t find it in his heart to say no to those eyes.

 “S-sure. Just don’t cause trouble, okay?”

“What am I going to do Ryan? I’m dead, remember?”

 If anyone else had said those words Ryan would think of them as self-pity, but Brendon said them with such a bright smile and happy tone that Ryan couldn’t even find it in himself to feel bad for him.

 “We c-can leave after I get dressed.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Ryan was annoyed.

 

When he told Brendon that he could show him around he wanted to see things like the library or the best places to eat. He defiantly didn’t need to see the park.

 

Especially not for three hours.

 

“C-can we leave yet Brendon? There are more things in t-town that I want to see.” Ryan said while sitting on a swing

“Just a few more minutes Ryan. Don’t be such a Debby Downer.” Brendon responded while swinging on the swing next to Ryan.

Brendon had said that same thing two hours ago on the monkey bars.

_‘He is impossible’_

Normally Ryan would just explore town by himself, but since Brendon was leading the way he wasn’t paying attention to where they were going.

In other words, Ryan had no idea where they were.

So he instead decided to just wait until Brendon wanted to go home. He had to get bored eventually after all. So, Ryan just sat there on that swing waiting.

 

It only took him about fifteen minutes to get lost in his memories.

 

_After Ryan had met Anita for the first time he decided to tell his father about her._

_When Ryan found him George was drinking the strange liquid that Ryan had been forbidden to drink by his mother, but Ryan didn’t think too much of it being far to use to seeing this particular occurrence._

_“Dad I met a new friend today!”_

_“What are you talking about boy? You didn’t even leave the front yard.”_

_And with all the ignorant bravery that only a child can have Ryan began to tell his father of his meeting with the strange woman in his kitchen._

_George didn’t take Ryan’s story too well and accused him of lying._

_That was the first time that George beat Ryan._

_Ryan never mentioned Anita again._

 

Apparently Ryan was more zoned out than he thought, because when he opened his eyes the first thing he saw was a face that he didn’t recognize **_really_** close to his and eyeliner. Lots of eyeliner.

_‘What the fuck’_

**THUMP**

 

Ryan was so startled that he fell off of his swing.

 

Who wouldn’t be startled if some random dude in eyeliner and all black got all up in their face?

“Oh, sorry about that dude. I didn’t mean to scare you. You just seemed really lost in thought.” Eyeliner guy said while sticking out a hand to help Ryan up.

“It’s okay a-accidents happen” Ryan replied while taking eyeliner guy’s hand and letting him pull him up

 

When they’re both standing Ryan can’t help but notice how short the guy is.

 

“Are you new here? No offence but I don’t think that I’d forget someone like you.” Says emo guy

Ryan can’t tell if he’s talking about not forgetting his too large, ratty clothes or the fading bruises on his face. Either way he’s offended.

 

_‘This guy has no room to judge anyone’s appearance. ‘_

 

“Y-yeah. I just moved in yesterday. I’m st-starting at the high school tomorrow.”

Eyeliner dude grins “In that case welcome to Monroeville! We don’t have much, but at least I’m here to keep the town’s citizens entertained.”

 

_‘What a tool.’_

 

Eyeliner guy sticks his hand out in an attempt at a hand shake. Ryan decides to give him a chance and shakes it.

If possible emo boy’s grin widens “I’m Pete by the way” he responds

 

_‘At least now I can stop referring to him as emo dude’_

 

“Just Pete?” Ryan asks in an attempt to learn the strangers full name

“I mean if you want to get technical it’s Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz III.” Pete responds

 

It's quite for a moment.

Ryan lets out a shaky breath and Pete gazes at him with a puzzled look.

Eventually Ryan can’t hold it in anymore.

 

He burst out laughing.

 

It’s not a little chuckle either. It’s a full out _laugh._ It’s the kind of laugh that he would use when Spencer would do something stupid like stick an M&M up his nose and not be able to get it out.

Suddenly he’s bending over clutching his side in an attempt to catch his breathe.

 

He hasn’t laughed like this since before his mother died.

 

Pete looks a little bit hurt at the obvious insult of his name but he plays it off well enough.

“Yeah, I know. My name’s _so_ fucking hilarious.” Pete responds with a deadpan expression. “It’s common courtesy to give your name after someone else does you know.”

 

Ryan decides to let him in on the joke.

 

“George Ryan Ross III at your service.” Ryan replies while doing a mock bow

 

Now it’s Pete’s turn to laugh.

 

Curing the exchange Brendon looks over at them like they’re crazy but continues to play on the rocket ship that he had moved over to sometime during Ryan and Pete’s conversation.

 _'Someone playing on a rocket ship has no room to judge me'_  

 

“Our parents are terrible at names” Pete manages to say between chuckles.

Ryan couldn't help but agree.

 

_‘Maybe moving won’t be so bad if this town is filled with people like Pete…’_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not going to lie one of the main reasons that I made this story was to write the scene about Ryan and Pete laughing at their long ass names.
> 
> I just want to let you know that I appreciate all the support that I get for this story. Your comments literally make my day.


	6. Chapter 6

_Dear ~~Diary~~ Journal,_

_Today I have been reminded on why I hate ghosts._

_After Pete and I finished laughing about our (ridiculous) names we started telling each other a little bit about ourselves. (We didn’t talk about anything too personal considering the fact that we’re practically strangers.)_

_I learned rather trivial things about him like the fact that he plays soccer and has a boyfriend named Patrick (at least Monroeville isn’t as homophobic as my home town). Apparently Pete’s an eleventh grader, but Patrick is a tenth grader like me_

_“Don’t worry Ryan. I’ll make sure that Pattycakes looks out for you” Pete had said when I expressed the nervousness that I was feeling about moving to a completely new place._

_Just as I had started talking about my love for The Beatles Brendon decided that he was bored, and instead of just waiting for me to finish my conversation with Pete like a normal person (ghost?) he decided to make a game out of getting me to leave._

_His antics were tolerable at first, but after discovering that repeatedly saying my name while banging on the ground wasn’t going to work he decided to step up his game and mess with Pete in various ways._

_It started out harmless enough. He would do small things like pushing the swings or making the merry-go-round turn._

_“Woah” Pete had said after a particularly hard push of the swing from Brendon “That must be one big gust of wind”_

_Over the course of ten minutes it had gone from harmless fun to Brendon standing next to Pete and saying random bullshit to get my attention._

_“You know Ryan, I’m **way** hotter than this guy. If it came down to a showdown for your affection I could probably take him. I mean he can’t even see me, so I would defiantly win”_

_After about fifteen minutes of Brendon declaring all the ways that he’d be able to “fight for my love” Pete said that it was getting chilly (Brendon was literally breathing down his neck) and decided that he should probably be heading home._

_Brendon being a bitch wasn’t what upset me though._

_It was the fact that he insisted on going home so early._

_After a forty-five-minute walk that consisted of Brendon rambling about Frank Sinatra we finally made it back home. However, just as I was about to open the front door Brendon insisted that he had to do something and said that he’d talk to me later. I had no idea what a ghost could be doing, but It wasn’t my problem. What was my problem however was the fact that when I walked through my front door my father was waiting for me in the living room._

_He was completely drunk._

_“Where the hell have you been boy?!” he shouted as I walked into the living room._

_“W-With a friend” I managed to stutter out._

_“DON’T LIE TO ME BOY! NO ONE WANTS TO BE FRIENDS WITH A FAG LIKE YOU”_

_I had never agreed with any statement more in my life._

_What happened after that is kind of a blur. What I do remember however was getting the hell beat out of me (as per usual). Luckily none of the marks are on my face this time around, so I’ll be able to start the school year off without too many questions._

_Somewhere along the line I managed to take a shower and get dressed. Brendon came back about an hour ago from whatever it is that he was doing. He seems pretty out of it, but it’s not my place to question him. We don’t know each other very well after all. Maybe one day though (hopefully not)._

_It’s getting pretty late and I have school tomorrow, so I should probably stop writing for now._

_-Ryan Ross_

 

Ryan closes his journal with a sigh. Writing in it had become a habit ever since Spencer had given it to him three years ago claiming that he “needed to vent his emotions” or some bullshit along those lines. If asked he would claim that writing in a journal was for emotional saps, but in actuality he loved it.

When you’re poor as dirt and can’t afford to go out you do whatever you can for entertainment. For Ryan that just so happened to be writing.

 

Ryan is suddenly broken from his thoughts when Brendon sits beside him.

 

“Ryan.” Brendon says with a serious expression

“Y-Yes?”

“You know that you’re allowed to ask me questions, right?”

“W-What are you talking about?”

Brendon lets out an exasperated sigh

“Ever since you’ve gotten here I’ve asked you anything that came to my mind. Whether it be your middle name or the color of your underwear, but you didn’t even ask for my name.”

_‘It’s not my place to know’_

“I’m not very c-curious.”

“Bullshit.”

For a minute Ryan feels as though Brendon’s eyes are gazing into his soul.

“Some random ass ghost is living in your house. Of course you’re curious. Ask me anything.”

 

For a moment Ryan considers asking him how he died.

 

‘ _That’s too personal.’_

“How old are you?” Ryan asks after hesitating for a moment.

Brendon just stares at him with an annoyed expression.

 

“It was suicide.” he says after a moment of awkward silence.

 

Now it’s Ryan’s turn to stare.

 

“Being a seventeen-year-old homosexual in a house filled with Mormons isn’t a good combination. At the time my father’s gun seemed like a good option” Brendon continues.

For a moment Ryan thinks that Brendon’s eyes are starting to become glassy.

 

“It’s not that big of a deal. It was five years ago.”

 

Ryan’s usually not a very emotional individual, but if that line doesn’t break his heart, then he doesn’t know what does.

For some reason he’s suddenly compelled to hug Brendon

 

Ryan doesn’t know how it happens, but one minute him and Brendon are sitting a respectful distance apart and the next Brendon’s crying into his shoulder.

 

“Shh, it’s okay Brendon. E-Everything is alright”

 

Ryan has no idea what the fuck he’s doing. Spencer was always the one who comforted people. Ryan was just there in the background. Now his social awkwardness is coming back at full force to bite him in the ass.

He decides to just sit there and rub circles into Brendon’s back and whisper false reassurances and see how that goes.

It works in movies after all.

 

_‘How the fuck did this even happen? I wouldn’t have even dreamed of trying to comfort someone like this last week.’_

Apparently whatever the fuck he’s doing worked better than he thought, because after a few minutes of Ryan’s awkward attempt at comfort Brendon is asleep (which is rather weird considering the fact that ghosts don’t actually _need_ sleep. It’s just something that some do if they’re bored).

_‘I guess that sleeping is better than having to deal with this situation in this case’_

 

Ryan can’t help but agree with Brendon’s logic.

 

_‘Maybe I should join him?’_ he thinks while letting out a yawn.

 

“Sweet dreams.” Ryan says while kissing Brendon’s temple in a soothing gesture most likely picked up from his mother.

 

Within minutes Ryan manages to falls asleep curled up against Brendon’s side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHEN I WAS TRYING TO EDIT THIS CHAPTER I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED IT, SO IF YOU SEE THAT I UPDATED AND ARE CONFUSED THAT'S PROBABLY WHY
> 
> Sorry for the inconvenience. 
> 
> Feel free to leave me a comment. They literally make my day, and I appreciate your opinions. :) 
> 
> Fast food  
> Greasy  
> Taco  
> I love

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, I realize that this is shit. This is my first fanfiction and I'm writing it to see if I can more than anything. If you see something wrong with it feel free to tell me and I'll fix it to the best of my ability.  
> Thanks for reading.


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